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May 22nd, 2011
07:09 PM ET

Finding a Faithful Mate: Questions to Help Spot a Cheater

The accusations against Dominique Strauss-Kahn and the admissions of Arnold Schwarzenegger this week begs the question - how can a woman stop her mate from cheating? Strauss-Kahn, the former chief of the International Monetary Fund, faces multiple charges including attempted rape. Schwarzenegger, action star and former governor of California, admitted he fathered a child with his housekeeper. Dr. Wendy Walsh, author of the "The Boyfriend Test," told CNN's Don Lemon six important questions women need to ask prospective partners to see if they're at higher risk of cheating.

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Filed under: CNN Newsroom • Don Lemon
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  1. David

    I can not believe that CNN put this person on the air. "Expert"? Hardly, everything she stated was nothing more than obvious information. Specifically the last bit about SAT scores; intelligence has less to do with monogamy and has more to do with impulsiveness.

    May 23, 2011 at 7:39 am |
  2. PallComm

    I don't know I'd agree with that. I know at least 4 guys who are all planning or in an affair because of lack of interest on their wive's part. One guy even said "ten minutes a week, and she can't even give me that". I feel that way myself.

    May 23, 2011 at 12:49 pm |
  3. Bilbo

    And then of course there's reason #1, that their wife turns into Broomhilda after the wedding.

    May 23, 2011 at 1:31 pm |
  4. chris patrick

    Questions to ask if you think your boyfriend will cheat:

    1) Are you overweight. He's more likely to go after someone more physically attractive if you are overweight.

    2) Are you bad in bed or lacking in an adventurous attitude? He's more likely to cheat on you for sexual release. Are you quiet or reserved?

    3) Are you conservatively dressed...all the time. Do you wear sweats to bed. Do you constantly wear socks. Do you no longer do your hair or put in an effort. If you refuse to wear short skirts or wear make-up, he's more likely to cheat.

    4) Do you spend more time with the kids than with your husband? Bingo – he's getting ready to go.

    5) Did you marry in your early to mid 20's? Odds are – he's going to get bored in about 10 years and yup...he's going to cheat.

    Now the same applies in reverse gender order.

    May 23, 2011 at 3:16 pm |
  5. Jack

    Hey thats Kinda unfair I know just as many WOMEN that do the same frigen thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    May 23, 2011 at 4:36 pm |
  6. Justin


    I agree with you on this woman's credentials. Seriously who is she to say?

    That being said, I disagree with your statement about intelligence and monogamy. Plenty of behavioral sciences have shown, study after study, that the single largest prediction of martial satisfaction and longevity is intelligence compatability. I don't know to what extent this plays a role in fidelity, but to say it has no relationship whatsoever with it is to go against a ton of longterm studies.

    So while low IQ or high IQ doesn't say one is more or less likely to cheat, 2 people having incompatible IQ's does have strong predictive value in whether or not that relationship works out. Again, it isn't the score that matters, but how close the two scores are together.

    If you don't want to believe it based on personal experience, anecdote, or hunch, then that's fine – but at least know that the scientific literature does support a link between intelligence and the longevity of happy relationships.

    May 23, 2011 at 6:25 pm |
  7. Peter

    That lady spent most of her time rehashing old stereotypes about men, she didn't want to talk about women cheating. Frankly I find and all studies report this, that women grossly underreport cheating, and frankly are much smarter at it than men.
    Here is a big shocker, studies have shown that 4 % of men are raising children they think are their own, but DNA testing proves their spouse cheated and conceived by another man. Since cheating women try not to get prenagant, you can only guess at the number cheating and the frequency.

    May 23, 2011 at 11:26 pm |
  8. Gordon McElwain

    Some men of power, wealth, influence do cheat on their partners; some men of less stature do also. BUT...some women cheat also. And the more women who attain positions of power, etc. will add to their gender's numbers, too.

    Perhaps CNN/Time should consider stories on why women knowingly have affairs with married men and why some women "accidentally" get pregnant, especially with athletes.

    Gordon McElwain
    Santa Barbara, Ca.

    May 24, 2011 at 3:18 am |
  9. Ajay

    Simply and bluntly its a woman's world. Women are lokeod to for leadership in their households and business. This along with women being more complex than men and having the men around them compete for their affection makes it more understandable for a woman to want to be stimulated by more than one man. Men have fallen of the pace today and I think more and more men ,although they don't like it, accept a woman's unfaithfulness and realize they are better off staying with a woman because of all she provides

    July 24, 2012 at 9:30 am |

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